I am a computer programmer and my diet consists of junk food. Couple that with a stagnant moving position and you have DAMIEN THE GIANT and I don't mean that in a good way. I used to drink sugary substances and partake of many fine products from the hallowed halls of Mars, Inc. Now, as I am older and needing to be DAMIEN THE NOT SO GIANT AND NOT SO TINY JUST RIGHT SIZED... I stay away from the junk food.
In the evenings, I tend to drink wine these days. A nice merlot hits the spot just right with my dinner to help that digestion and to help lower my Moon High Cholesterol levels. Just in the right amounts it does the body good right right?
Well, isn't that like religion in my life?
I mean, my early formative years was me being dragged around a Church of Christ Environment and the Church of Christ are a very solemn lot. Dancing is bad, music is mostly bad, don't make the deacons mad because they can fire the pastor or they can set you on fire with their eye lasers. Mostly rather a frumpy lot and I have direct experience to this fact. Sorry if any of you are Church of Christ members... no, I am not apologizing for my words either. I was one of you, I am really sorry.
Later, I ended up Baptist. Whhooooo I was a long haired metal freak in highschool trying to make it in a Baptist church, a televised one at that too. Those experiences were fun, but lacked any real substance. The same stories over and over again, all sugary and happy and anything else was frowned upon. You could not challenge ideas with new ideas, you could not sate your own appetite with logic, because the printed answer was always "You have to have faith".
Well, I had faith, I mean I had faith every time I sat in the pew right? I mean the pew isn't going to collapse and drop me to the floor right? But I also understood the reason why the pew did not just fall apart. I understood that screws, nails, glue, the positioning and angle of the legs, all of that held the pew upright so I did not have to worry about anything and I could practice faith. If I saw a rickety chair, poorly constructed I am not going to have much faith that it will hold aloft my fat butt.
So, my approach to religion is the same way, thanks to Georges Lemaitre who constructed the first theory of the Big Bang, who just so happened to be a Catholic priest I was able to begin in my own life rationalizing and finding common ground between the existance of God and the perpetual motion clock of our universe.
However there is a major pitfall and I did not avoid it and I fell into the train of throught that suddenly God was more distant. I began to believe that perhaps God has limited or no involvement in our lives. Sure he wants us to live morally, however I understood with reason and logic that to live a moral life was for the good of myself, my family and society as a whole and not necessarily that of God or religious texts installing in me.
My wife, bless her, loves me and has not smothered me in my sleep yet. She is incredibly too good for the likes of me, but I am so incredibly gifted with her by my side. I see time and time again the good that she draws to her and her heart. In the recent tragedy in our lives I am beginning to see things that stir my heart. I don't know if it is actually God doing anything, but those who believe he is directly working in their lives have been showing that love to us. I have been touched by that love.
So I am searching for truth and some questions I will be posting simply do not have any answer too, but you can thank my grandfather for those genes. I am an inquisitive type and I will even toss out those "Devil's Advocate" questions, not to be mean spirited and not to be all angry. I ask those kinds of questions because I look for truth and honest answers.
I am looking for something finer to my mental and spiritual self than a big bottle of Faygo, I am looking for a smooth merlot or a nice shiraz.
Oh and what does Faygo taste like? Sugar Water ...reminds one of Jolt really. Lots and lots of sugar, the kind of sugary high that makes your teeth chatter and it opens up wormholes in space. Which could be really cool if you want to pull a Dr. Dave Bowman.
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